How did you feel when your baby was born? Did you feel an overwhelming surge of love for your baby as soon as they were born? Did you feel relief, happiness, completely exhausted? I remember feeling overjoyed to finally meet my baby girl. I felt a surge of emotion but I’m not sure that I felt that rush of love that they talk about in all the books. Studies [1] have found that 20% of new mums and dads feel no real emotional attachment to their newborns in the hours after delivery. If you would like to communicate love to your baby and understand how to increase your bond with your newborn keep reading.
1. Talk to your baby
Your baby loves the sound of your voice. Talk to them when you’re changing their nappy, tell them what you are doing “so let’s change your nappy, open your babygro, one leg…two legs…” Or sing to them, your favourite nursery rhyme or the latest song from your favourite singer. Your baby doesn’t mind what you chose as long as they hear your voice. Not only are you building a connection with your baby, but you are also teaching them how communication works and laying the foundations for their language development. How amazing is that?
2. Make eye contact with your baby
Babies love looking at faces. Researchers[2] have found that eye contact between a baby and an adult causes their brain waves to sync together. The study shows that when eye contact is made, babies become more motivated to vocalize; this process gets them ready to communicate, ready to take turns in a conversation– to talk and to listen. Gaze into your baby’s eyes and feel your bond strengthening and your brain waves synchronising.
3. Touch
Touch is your baby’s most developed sense at birth. The effect of positive touch can have a stimulating or relaxing effect on the body due to a high concentration of nerve endings in the skin. The right kind of touch can reduce pain, soothe our stress and convey emotion faster than words. It’s a sense that you can’t turn off and we should not underestimate its power. For your baby, touch through massage has physiological benefits such as aiding digestion and relieving colic and constipation and psychological benefits such as promoting relaxation and improving the quality of sleep. For parents, touch through baby massage helps to strengthen their relationship with the baby and provides mutual pleasure, a focused time for parent and baby to spend time learning about each other.
4. Exchange of smell- Pheromones
Did you know that within 2 hours of their newborn’s birth 80% of mothers can distinguish their baby’s clothes by smell? (Porter 1983) [3]Pheromones are exchanged in the womb, through breastfeeding and physical contact. In both humans and animals, they are used as identifiers, so a fawn will sniff the back legs of female deer before finding their mother. This mother-child bond through pheromones is lifelong. This exchange of smell means that babies can identify their mother, recognize that she will keep them safe and fed and the same goes for Mothers, they recognize their baby as they own and want to keep them safe and fed. For a mother, the scent of their baby triggers certain hormones in their body like Oxytocin.
5. Release oxytocin
Oxytocin is known as the feel-good hormone or ‘love hormone. It has powerful effects on the body and mind and is designed to be present during birth and when breastfeeding. The more oxytocin you have the more loving and attentive you are towards your baby. There are many ways you can increase your levels of oxytocin, through simple, enjoyable activities such as loving your baby, touching or hugging another person, loving a pet, giving or receiving a massage, singing, dancing and massaging your baby or cuddling them. Any activity that results in you building a loving connection with someone or feeling love. The more love you are feeling, the more Oxytocin is produced, the more love you have to give and the more relaxed you feel. Love Creates Love
Using these 5 actions every day will communicate your love to your baby increase your bond with your newborn and help you to enjoy spending time together.
Baby_Cherish™ aims to
– promote benefits of baby massage and give babies relief from colic, constipation, teething, and tension
– improve infant mental health and well-being
– strengthen the connection and bond between baby and mum, dad or carer
To see all our courses look here If you would like to book a course with us click here
[1] https://www.webmd.com/parenting/baby/forming-a-bond-with-your-baby-why-it-isnt-always-immediate#1
[2] Leong, V et al. Speaker gaze increases infant-adult connectivity
[3] Maternal recognition of neonates through olfactory cues,R H Porter, J M Cernoch, F J McLaughlin